Are you better off than you were four years ago?
A famous actor once asked that question in a debate with a former peanut farmer. Of course, I’m referring to the classic intellectual joust between Sir Anthony Hopkins and George Washington Carver. It was really tough to organize the event, given the fact that the two participants lived in different eras. A lot of people don’t know that.
The line was repeated with devastating effect in 1980 when former Governor Ronald Reagan (R-California) debated incumbent President Jimmy Carter (D) in a bid to deprive Carter of a second term.
High school boys in 2019 wear “Make America Great Again”
hats for the same reason high school boys in 1992 wore Slayer t-shirts: contrarianism and attention seeking. Well,
it’s almost the same, except the members of Slayer are actually good at their
jobs and worthy of fandom.
It’s the reason we saw University of South Carolina baseball
caps around the University of Houston during my tenure. South Carolina is a
thousand miles from Houston, and most of us had never been there. But you see,
Carolina’s mascot is the gamecock,
and their 90’s era hats said “COCKS” across the front. To quote myself and
every dude I knew circa 1998 (and 2019, to be fair), “Uh…huh huh…huh huh…he
said cocks.” “Cocks” has a much more je ne sais quai than “Cougars,” no?
Thanksgiving is Thursday, which means a few things:
First, it means that you’re probably going to eat and drink more than you intended and regret the hell out of it. I recommend dropping a few Alka-Seltzers into some vodka to make a delicious holiday digestif. You’ll either feel better, won’t care, or both. Continue reading